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Entry 2088, on 2020-11-12 at 14:40:43 (Rating 3, Computers)

I often wonder how most people get anything done with their computers and other digital devices. There is no doubt that there are many aspects of the operation of modern computers which are far more friendly than they ever have been in the past, but then there are some other functions which could do with some improvement!

I have ranted in the past about how many parts of widely used application programs, operating systems, and web sites could be made a lot more intuitive, but this time I want to concentrate on the technical support and helpdesk systems operated by large computer companies. In this case I am concentrating on a recent incident involving some of New Zealand's internet sevice providers. So these companies aren't very big compared with US and international corporations, but they are still big enough to have terrible tech support!

Here's what happened...

I was asked to visit a friend and person who I offer IT support for, because her internet and landline phone had stopped working. After arriving I confirmed that she was quite right and that neither were showing any signs of life.

She had already contacted the ISP, Spark, which is New Zealand's biggest service provider, a day or two back and gone through all the usual stuff like resetting the router, etc. They said they would call back on the day that I had visited to resolve the issue.

I checked the hardware: computer, modem, and ONT (this was for a fibre connection) and it looked like they were all working as expected except the ONT's connection to the internet was continually failing. So I messaged the Spark support person and he called back quite promptly, so we could start diagnosing the problem.

I told him it looked like there was an issue at the ISP end and he eventually agreed and checked the status of the account. Apparently Spark no longer controlled that account and it had been haded over to a different ISP at the request of the customer. She told me that there was no way she had done this, so either Spark had made a mistake or someone malicious had "stolen" the account.

The next step was to be transferred from general technical support to the accounts section, so we went ahead with that. So now we had to endure that most painful process: waiting in the queue for someone to answer.

While waiting, a calming voice assured us that "We do our best to make sure everything at Spark is always running smoothly." I'll get back to this later, but after a few repetitions this statment began to lose any reassuring value it might have initially had.

We also experienced some interesting music while waiting, including a reggae song featuring the work "sorry" in its lyrics - which seemed appropriate - and a rather bland pop song featuring "thinking about you". Ah, yeah... right.

Eventually we got through to the accounts section, but there were long delays and unexpected pauses, so I'm not sure what was happening there. I'm guessing the center was situated in somewhere like Mumbai, but I can't be sure.

Anyway, that didn't really provide any useful information, so I decided to call back the general Spark help number. Because I knew there would be a big delay in answering, I also started an on-line chat with the Spark helpdesk.

So after about 15 minutes (pretty good for Spark; my record wait is 2 hours, at which point I gave up) both answered at about the same time. I typed messages to one while talking to the other, but eventually decided to concentrate on the phone call.

According to the accounts team, to have the account restored to Spark's control, we would need to find out which other company had taken it over so a change could be coordinated between the two. That seemed OK, so I asked what the other company was. They said they didn't know, or maybe they did but couldn't tell us, or maybe someone else at a higher level at Spark knew but also couldn't tell us. This aspect of the situation seemed a bit unclear, and the fact that English was probably not the helpdesk staffers native language didn't help.

In the end, Spark's advice was to contact the other ISPs and find out if they had taken control, so that could be reversed. I asked how many companies I would need to call and was informed there are 86 in New Zealand.

This seemed like an extremely arduous process, which could easily take weeks depending on the time it took for the phone to be answered, so I suggested that maybe we could talk to Chorus - the New Zealand company which controls the underlying fibre infrastructure - and the Spark person agreed that was worth a try. At this point I think he would have told me anything to remove responsibility from him, but I had little choice.

So I called Chorus and they answered quite quickly. Note that they are primarily a company which deals with other companies rather than the public, so they don't really have a consumer focussed helpdesk. But they were quite helpful, apart from one thing: they couldn't solve the problem. They said that Spark were wrong, and that they could take back control of the account without the need to talk to the other company who had been given control. I asked for them to confirm this, since in contradicted what Spark had said, and they assured me it was true.

So I thanked them and called Spark back. I won't bore you by saying how long it took (yes I will: 40 minutes, then a further 15 until the accounts section called back) to get through, or what horrible music I listened to, but I was hopeful that a second opinion at Spark might lead to some progress, so I persevered.

Of course, it wan't that easy. The second person at Spark assured us that they really did need to know who the other company was, and they weren't going to listen to any alternative views, even from Chorus. Things weren't looking too encouraging at this point, but there seemed no alternative apart from calling the other companies. Spark suggested Vodafone, New Zealand's second biggest ISP, would be a good place to start.

So I hung up that call and called Voda. After 20 minutes of going around in circles they told us that they had no record of the account having been transferred, but that Spark didn't need to know who the other company was anyway, confirming what Chorus had said. They also said that, even if they did know, they couldn't tell us, and that accounts can't be transferred the way Spark said they could anyway.

By this time I had wasted about 3 hours getting nowhere and I was hours late visiting the next person on my list. So the person I was helping said she would like to visit Spark in person tomorrow (which is today as I write this) to see if more progress could be made that way. I agreed that was worth a try, and the issue should now have been resolved, but only after certain actions which I can't describe here, and were possibly "not entirely within the rules".

The customer - who is an older person living alone - was getting really stressed during the time I have described above, because the internet is an important service for almost everyone now, plus her landline also wasn't working. The only good point was that her iPhone still worked, despite that also being with Spark, so she wasn't completely cut off from the rest of the world.

But all of this happened despite me - an IT expert with decades of experience - being there. What would it have been like for the average person who doesn't have any background in the area, and is unsure about what questions to ask, how to reset a modem, what an ONT is, or dozens of other issues?

It's a nightmare, and this isn't an isolated case. Just about everyone I talk to dreads having to call the helpdesks that these companies operate. They rarely work efficiently, and sometimes they don't work at all. My worst experience was waiting for about 90 minutes listening to horrible "music", then to be unexpectedly cut off. But it can get even worse than that, because I know people who follow helpdesk instructions and lose data, or get their access cut-off completely, or buy a service they don't need. So they would literally have been better doing nothing.

Yet this blight continues unabated. Even organisations which previously had quite good support systems in place have moved to the standard helpdesk model. It just seems to be something that modern managers do. No doubt it is "best practice", AKA the most stupid, thoughtless nonsense management idiots can dream up.

But there are a couple of good things about these helpdesks. Even if they are "experiencing unprecedented demand" at least they keep saying "your call is important to us" and "We do our best to make sure everything is always running smoothly." But if what I just experienced is their best, I would hate to see their worst!

Comment 1 (5606) by Anonymous on 2020-11-13 at 09:48:09:

Seems like managers are to blame for everything according to you. How about the actual people making the mistakes?

Comment 2 (5607) by OJB on 2020-11-13 at 10:38:11:

I try to blame "management" rather than "managers", although sometimes my wording isn't precise enough to make that clear. Also, I don't blame them for everything, just most things where they have any influence. There are undoubtedly incompetent employees as well. In the situation I described above, it seemed to be the system which was the problem, not the person.

Comment 3 (5608) by Anonymous on 2020-11-13 at 12:12:59:

LOL. Isn't management just another word for managers?

Comment 4 (5609) by OJB on 2020-11-13 at 12:14:50:

Yeah, OK, it can be. But in this context it means (or I meant it to mean) the process of managing, or the underlying theory, or the standard practices. It's like saying I hate cancer, but not cancer patients. Note this should not be construed (necessarily) as a claim that management is a cancer!

Comment 5 (5610) by Anonymous on 2020-11-13 at 13:16:17:

Hmmm, why not be honest and just state that it is managers you have an issue with?

Comment 6 (5611) by OJB on 2020-11-13 at 14:45:37:

Because I don't. Many managers I know are really nice people. The problem is they are part of a corrupt system which forces them to behave in a way they often disagree with. That's why I say management is the problem, not managers.

Here's an example: yesterday I was in a shop, belonging to a large NZ company, trying to sort out a technical issue. The person said he could fix it in 5 minutes because there were no managers around forcing him to do things the wrong way. It's the process of management which is a hindrance to efficiency and progress.

Comment 7 (5653) by Anonymous on 2020-11-19 at 11:53:21:

No, it's the process of bad management which is a hindrance to efficiency and progress.

Comment 8 (5661) by OJB on 2020-11-19 at 21:32:15:

I think management is just an inherently bad thing. It's basically a situation where people with little talent and no useful skills get to tell people who do have skills and talent what to do. I'm engaging in a bit of hyperbole here, and I know there are exceptions where managers actually make a useful contribution, but I'm really criticising the fundamental process here, not the people who perform those roles.

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