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Grumpy Old Men

Entry 2206, on 2022-03-02 at 12:43:27 (Rating 3, Comments)

I am often accused of being a grumpy old man, or an obnoxious white male, or a middle class bigot, amongst others. I have had some controversial opinions in the past, but the negative reaction has never been as bad as it is now. I think this is mainly because I have become more outspoken, although I think there is little doubt that it is also related to people being more easily triggered now, and that there are more outlets for "vigorous debate" (primarily internet-based social media).

I saw a quote the other day which might provide a few hints about the origin of this phenomenon. It is: "There is no such thing as a grouchy old person. The truth is, once you get old, you stop being polite and start being honest."

I'm not sure how much truth is in this, because it's just a quote - in other words, an idea someone had - and that makes it no better than an anecdote. In fact, I think the primary reason for me being seen as a grumpy old person is that I disagree with the ideas most young people have, and am happy to say so.

This is primarily because younger people tend to be more idealistic and dogmatic, where older people have probably come from that perspective in the past, realised that it doesn't work very well, and moved on to more pragmatic solutions.

For example, the idea of affirmative action (a positive spin on the idea that some groups need special privileges to make them more equal with other groups) is popular amongst young people today. I have looked at the consequences of this where it has been implemented and rejected it on the basis that it has too many negative side effects, and that it is somewhat doubtful whether it even does much for the people it is designed to help.

Another example is climate change. Younger people seem to be scared of the imminent destruction of the planet or at least of society. But while there will be negative consequences of climate change, they won't be as bad as what many young people seem to think; at least that's what the best predictions seem to say.

Similar arguments apply to all the trendy issues we see in the media today: economic inequality, racism, colonialism, dangerous technologies like nuclear power, etc. All of these are issues we should be aware of, but they aren't the existential crises many people think they are.

If I wanted to appear like a nice, caring person, who is fully committed to these types of causes, then I might either accept them without really researching their accuracy, or I might just pretend they are true, even if I knew about their problems. But I prefer to say what I think rather than what other people want me to say, which means I often reject concepts which other people just assume are good.

Because as a person gets older they tend to worry less about fitting into the crowd. Young people in their teens and early 20s are notoriously famous for wanting to be seen as part of the same team their friends are part of, but older people not so much.

I should say at this stage that these generalisations are simply my opinion, although they do seem to be backed up with what we see in the real world. They are also stereotypes to some extent, although stereotypes often have some basis in fact. But I'm not claiming all young people and all older people act in identical ways; I'm just trying to establish a general trend which applies to the majority in each group.

So getting back to the original claim about older people being grumpy. Is that really true or is it actually the young people getting grumpy with their "climate emergency" protests, Black Lives Matter marches, and other actions? It seems to me that they're the ones who are grumpy. The extent of my grumpiness is to tell them to stop being so grumpy because things aren't as bad as they think they are.

I think of it as a voice of reason and moderation amongst the irrational hysteria we so often see. Unfortunately the people engaging in the hysterical behaviour feel the need to defend themselves, and instead of actually debating the points, calling the opposition a grumpy old man (although sometimes it is women too) is an easy solution to the problem.

So sure, use that label if you want to, but don't assume grumpy old men don't know anything. We got to this stage of maturity by working through many issues society has thrown at us. We know something. In fact, we have been on this planet three (or more) times as long as the young protestors. That experience should be worth something. Other societies value their older citizens, but that doesn't happen quite so much in the West.

It's about time that changed. Grumpy old men should be the most valued source of opinions, not one to be ridiculed. But that change probably won't happen, because anyone who engages honestly with us will probably be destroyed in a fair debate. No wonder we're grumpy!

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